'Cause I Was There When You Said Forever & Always

I love Taylor Swift :]
I'm listening to a cover done though and that girl is amazing too.

Okay, so when I said I kinda wanted to read Frankenstein I totally don't mean that anymore. I do not understand any of it. So this book should just be oh so fun to read, haha.

I'm so glad it's Fridaay! And I had more energy today which made me not be a grumpy muffin after school either:P We made crepes in culinary yesterday and today. I kinda failed, half the time atleast. I normally can cook. But of course when I'm graded on it I can't :P It wasn't too badddd.

AGHAHAHAHAAHA AND AT LuNCH! OMG! LAWL. We nuggeted(turning it inside out, putting everything back in like it's normal) Noelle's purse. The second day in a row! Haha I love you Noelle! I'm sorry, but it's hilarious! Sorry Sorry Sorry. There are so many things we do that we think are hilarious but if it got done to us we would NOT like it. Ah I guess that's the way life is :P Haha jk... uh gotta go. Have a spelendid weekend!

Hamster on a Piano, hamster on a piano...

Not really sure what I'm going to write here. I should be doing make up work. I did all my spanish and almost all of geometry in study, which is good. They're really the only classes I have a lot of work. Beside English, we're reading Frankenstein. I haven't started yet, I kind of want to read it because I've only known about the green monster and general stuff. But I have a feeling it's not a book I'll really enjoy, but hey that's school for you.

So glad today is Thursday. It feels like Monday for me after being out sick, so I will enjoy tomorrow because it's like a blast through the week. Bahaha I am so lame... and I keep seeing that picture of Nikki and Colin morphed together.
Omg it's pure genious. How can you look at that and not laugh or atleast think it's funny. Atlast we now know if Nikki and Colin ever had a kid, IT, referring to the child thing, would be the worst thing ever created :P Haha well I enjoyed seeing this.



So as I was saying today at lunch, I waste way too much time on the computer. I come home, hope on a computer, get a snack, lalalaa whatever, eat dinner, back on computer... on until I go to bed. It's really not healthy. It's not like I accomplish anything any way. Well hopefully I'll be better at resisting the computer so I can actually find a life. My ACTUAL accomplishments from the computer:
-Level 34 (almost 35) on iminlikewithyou.com . It's an arcade game site and your level basically reflects how much you play. My friends are like level 9s. Yeahhh. I've discovered I wasted over 70 hours of playing just ONE of the games(its really the only one I play). Ahh I hate myself :P
- I have read every single FML on fmylife.com. It's so hilarious, the website tht is. The fact that I did that in less than 3 days is rather so sad someone should like shoot my in the eye with a BBgun.

*Many minutes after* Okay so I just got really hyper and wow. Ah I can't explain it haha. I just got 7 dollars off of my sister from not laughing at David After Dentist on youtube. I ALWaYS laugh when he screams. bhahah, this time i could not laugh just ONCE for money. Yes, that's how I'll pay the bills when I grow up. Bets. :P

Okay well, I shall be off, good day/ night to all

Short blog. For once...

Feeling much better today, and just needed a day or rest and yeah. Still didn't do work that was assigned like a week ago to history, English, and other stuff, which I probs have to all hand in tomorrow. So I'm trying to figure out what to so about the English essay. But once I start hopefully I can get it done quick. Meh. So I don't have much to report, other than people are really lame and such bitches some times. They even resort to attacking friends, rather than the person they are actually trying to hurt. Ugh. I'm not even involved with this situation and I'M fed up watching things like that happen, I can't imagine how much it sucks to actually be involoved, and since like half of you reading this are, I'm sorry you have to deal with that, it's totally not necessary or wanted, and they just need to get a freakin life and get attention from people that actually, surprisingly care about them.

Just dance, gonna be okay, da-da-doo-doo

So Ring Dance was Friday, which was surprisingly really fun. Last year I didn't have as much fun at Snowflake so I expected this to be the same, but nope. I didn't dance with anyone or anything, I just had a lot of fun with friends. And I was happy for those who had good dates coughcough:] And I love my ring, it's lovely :] Then Saturday morning I woke up with a stuffy nose and knew I was getting sick, and it happened the next day. So Sunday I felt crappy and lazy and my throat was killing me every time I swallowed and just ugh. Monday I got ready for school but still felt like such crap but tried to stick it out for the day because my mom said I could get picked up if I couldn't stay. I went to the nurse, she looked at my throat, and said nothing really looked wrong with it. OKAY BECAUSE I CAN'T EVEN SWALLOW OR DRINK OR ANYTHING WITHOUT FEELING LIKE I'M GETTING TORTURED(the nurses are really nice but ugh). And just gave me some medicine. So went back to class with no energy, feeling just meh, and in pain. I went back to the nurse and told her my mom said I could go home so could I please call to get picked up. So I got picked up. And last night my mom said I probably shouldn't go to school tomorrow(today), so then when I woke up this morning I felt even more crappy, so she called the doctor, I went, and found out I have strep. After I take my medicine like dinner time, bed time, and when I wake up, I shouldn't be contagious anymore, but if I don't FEEL better (there is definitely a difference between not being contagious, and not feeling a-okay) so depending on how I feel tomorrow idunno if I'll be in school. But I kinda feel bad because I definitely shared my water at the dance and I really hope no one else gets sick :[ Of course the one time I willingly share my drink, I probably make the whole school suffer from strep throat, haha. So sorry in advance if I made you sick :[ Well I'm just going to go back to having strep... lucky me... sorry for having to write so much for such a short story and being melodramatic. I hate being sick.

Always going to be an uphill battle, Sometimes you going to have to lose

Miley Cyrus lyrics. I really don't like her. Very much at all. Especially that fact that she is a bad roles model for young children. Any ways, the song, The Climb, has a good message. The end.

So this weekend was pretty fun. Found my Ring Dance dress! It's all purple and ahh I love it! Looking for it was fun. And I had like 4 favorites, so narrowing it down was a toughy. I'm getting pretty excited for Ring Dance. Except I have no clue what I'm doing for like pictures and stuff before. And I'm getting paranoid/ mad. Because I don't wanna end up like begging to hang out with people who don't want me there. Meh. It will work out.

And then I went to Lizz's on Valentine's day! That was fun. We watched the cutest movie EVER, Once. Oh my, I HIGHLY recommend watching it. The songs are so beautiful and it's a such a cute story. Oh, and I found out just how much someone hates me. For no reason at all. That's always good. I was just being a good friend. Go figure, when I actually stand up and say what I want, that person likes to hold grudges. I didn't even say anything bad. I was mostly being sarcastic and funny. I still think my comment was hilarious. Apparently he has not funny bone. Well I don't care. I just hope my friend doesn't end up going out with him (she likes him...) or else, knowing him, he would like ban her from being friends with me. Whatever. I don't like the fact that she likes him after what he did to her, but she's willing to take that risk, so. I guess I'm ok with it no matter how much he hates me. I had a fun night, but we, well I stayed up] until 3, which is really late for me... kind of anyone. But she never sleeps. So when I said I was tiered she made a comment like "pshh 5 hours of sleep? I'm lucky if I can get that in a week". WELL. I can't function with less than like 8 hours of sleep and I'm in a bad mood for a week. And I've already been in a bad mood. And now I'm getting sick. SO excuse me for not being an insomniac like you and being fine with staying up all night. Sorry. I love her, but just because she can't sleep doesn't mean no one can complain about not being able to hold their eyes open. I sound more mad than I am. I'm not mad. But bleh.
Had a horrible night sleep last night. Wanted to come home from school and sleep for hours. But I had Big Brother Big Sister. Which I actually liked because the beloved Katie was at the back table with me<3 haha. I love her so much, she's so adorable. AND the annoying boy wasn't at the back table, he ALWAYS is. Woot! But then when I got picked up I had to go to the vet with my parents and dog for shots and such for like an hour. So by the time I got home I gave up hopes of taking a nap:P I'll just try to get to bed early tonight, and plan on taking a lovely nap tomorrow:]

This is my 50th post! Wooh

When I first made my blog I thought I'd blog a couple times then drop it, or wouldn't write very often. I've acutally been writing like almost every day for a good time now! Woohoo. Okay os tomorrow's Valentine's day! Yay. Normally I would be all "Meh I don't have a REAL Valentine this year D:" But that's stupid to do. Because Valentine's day means nothing except it's good for chocolate and candy companies, as well as flower shops and expensive restaurants. Plus when I was younger I was way to young to HAVE a Valentine. I mean if kids wanna date when they're young, go right ahead. But I find it pretty pointless. You just set yourself up to get your heart broken earlier and attract boys earlier, I don't know. It seems as all the people who had boyfriends in 5th and 6th grade are the ones in relationships that are kinda serious, which I wouldn't want at this age. I can barely find myself a gut ot have a crush on, let alone devote a lot of time with, like waking the halls, spending free time with them, talking on the phone all night. I mean it's cute. And I like to think that I WANT that, but if it came and hit my face right now I wouldn't really want it. See the thing is I dream of the perfect guy and cute moments and things he should do, but then I'll see nice guy with good potential and such but I always find something wrong. Which probably means in the back of my head I just am really trying to avoid it. Hum. Whatever. I'm not "love sick" this year, which is good. I have my friends who love me and why does having a guy on Valentine's Day any more special than having a guy any other day? He should shower me with gifts and chocolate and flowers and everything everyday! Bhaahahah just kidding. Really.

Anywho. Going shopping for Ring Dance and such tomorrow! I'm excited. It's in a week from today! Woah. Ah. Hokay. And then I'm going to my friends house and sleeping over and church.
I thought I was hanging out with Alex, her boyfrannn Timmayyyy, and Lizz, but apparently the plans changed that Alex wasn't able to go out, but could have Tim over, but not anyone else. So me and Lizz are spending Valentine's Day together<3 Haha. She's one of my Valentines! So is Alex. But she's taken AND I won't see her :[ And Allison is one as well! And of course my favorite ;] (It's not only because she's the only one who reads this blog out of my Valentines!) Tehehe<3

Okay well. Have an excellent Valentine's Day! And just know that you're friends are you're true Valentines and will love you forever, not a stupid guy:]

I really can't think of a title.

I went to the movies today to see Coraline. It was pretty good. And I had fun because it was with people I don't normally hang out with, and I haven't been to the movies since I THINK Fool's Gold, which might possibly have been almost a year ago? I love going to see movies, but I just never do, idunno... maybe I'll start arranging more movie going now?

I'm so excited for this 5 day weekend! Right now I would normally be in bed, either sleeping already or almost sleeping. But I am able to stay up as late as I want without having to suffer the next day by getting no sleep! Haha, yay! I'm always tired, no matter how much sleep I get. It's weird.

Anywho. I'm mad because I'm not going to Pennsylvania anymore D: Since my mom would have to drive because be dad doesn't want to go and offered to stay home with the dog, and my mom has a lot of doctors appointments and such within these 3 days, it's just not going to work. Even if she didn't have a lot to do, she wouldn't be able to drive for like 4 hours. And it pisses me off that my dad doesn't care that she was actually going to do that, and he didn't offer to actually come even though he doesn't care about our family. But that's because they never ever have gone out of their way to see us. Or even show up for holidays for that matter, lol. blah whatever.

I'm dying my air tomorrow and I'm so pumped. It prob won't be a big difference, but I'll feel like a BAMF. Not really. I'll just feel cool, okay? I always feel cool. Because I am oh so very cool! :]

And my adorable cousin Nea's birthday party is this weekend too! She's two years old and cutest kid I ever saw. AND she has an afro, what gets better than that? No one can ever argue that someone else is cuter :P

OH! AND. I found out I have a lot of money in my bank account (which I never take money out because I like collecting the money and SEEING big numbers and never using any of it:] ) And I decided I'm going to buy myself a laptop. I'll feel less of a spoiled annoying teenager complaining that I don't have my own computer when kids are starving and will never see a computer in their life, if I pay for it my self. Hopefully I won't spill water on it by accident again :[

Have a fabulous five day weekend everyone! :D

I can walk on water, I can fly, I will keep on fighting till I die

Humph. I've been kind of, I don't know, lately. Too many good slash bad slash annoying things going on. I'm not sure if I already said this, but this weekend I might go visit my family in Pennsylvania, which I'm really excited if I get to. But it depends on a lot of things, and the chances of ending up going is probably slim :| Because my dad doesn't really want to go, and someone would ave to stay home with Buddy, so that means my mom would have to drive for 3 and a half hours. And not to mention she needs to stop almost every 30 minutes to walk around. And I'm really not kidding, because of her back she just can't really do much of anything for too long. AND she has some doctors appointments the day before and the day of, that may make her hurt her back by getting evaluated and such. I just really wish I could go see them, Jayden has been their foster kid for like 5 years and she's just like family and I just like her so much. And if I could see her that would be awesome. Then her two brothers, of like, 9... Xavier and Zaachi went into custody because they were with their grandma then something happened. Then Zaachi was all like hyper and they thought he might hurt their little girl Maggie, so he went back into custody with someone else. But then they found out he had cancer, and that's why he was like irukgjmhsdngkj hyper or whatever. All three of them are back with my aunt and uncle, and I just really want to see them. Their whole situation is horrible because their mom has, I think nine kids, and they all have different fathers. And most of them are, or have been in jail. So they really just have hard lives.
Oh. And I really don't like awkwardness. Which seems to attract around me. Someone was my best friend since, I don't know when, we met in 3rd grade I think. And well we stopped being friends a couple years ago. So of course this year, well atleast this semester, she is in 5, 6 including the same lunch period, but that doesnt count, of the same classes as mine. If we were friends I would completely love that, because I don't have more than 2 classes with a friend of mine. But since we've already gone last semester without saying much to eachother, it's hard to like randomly become friends again. And she's not really friends with people I would like to be around, just like, what they do. I don't know. I wish we either stayed firends and enjoyed having tons of classes together, or were still not friends and didn't have any classes together. Because I have like no classes with my best friends, except for a FEW classes and lunch.
Meh. I don't like being grumpy because my whole family is grumpy. If everyone was happy and jolly and kind then I would be. I mean I'm not all emo and I hate life. But when someone is in a bad mood I tend to be for a little bit. But once I'm with friends or doing something fun it's not too bad. Woot three day school week and then a 5 day weekend. I'm so pumped! :]

Am I just another manwhose time went fast, what does it take to be called great. I don't wan't to live dying on the inside -Skillet.

I've come to realize that it is coming, taking action. It can be many things. But it is bad. It may turn out for the good, but we all know it is coming. We've seen the signs of it. We're aware that it is coming. Everything that has happened has led up to it, yet some of us chose to speak of it and some try to pretend they don't know what it is or what it is going to do. We know that it is going to change who were are. We know that it exists. We don't want to believe it, but we just know. It happens all the time. It is not welcome near us, yet it is going to enter despite being unwelcomed. It is never welcomed. Yet it always comes. Sometimes it doesn't. But it is coming in this case. This case is ruined. We'll never be the same. We just don't want to admit it is happening. At least some of us. If you admit it is happening, the more you can do to prevent it as possible. The longer you try to hide and not defend, the faster it will come. The first step to getting help is admitting you have a problem. It doesn't like admittance. It will hide. And never come back. So do all you can do to prvent it. Hiding in fear rushes it. Fix it, now, then it won't come. Like I said, it can be anything. It can be so vague yet so distinct. How you see it changes everything. It is anything.

I felt like being, I don't know. creative-ish. Intelectual, in a way. It. is. iukdgjmhnsrgdskmdngv sjldmsf.

If there's no one beside you when your soul embarks then I'll follow you into the dark

I came home from school, my brother came home for the weekend. I was kind of glad to see him because the last time I saw him seemed so distant from now. Even though we don't really talk at all besides saying Hi or something generic, it just kind of feels different when he's not here. It's not like he ever walked out of his room often because he stored food and drinks up there. But at night he would come out and watch TV with us. Basically. Shortly after I was home, my sister called from the bus to see if my cousin Sammi could come over. Her dad's house is literally 2, maybe three houses away from our road/house, so she was already on the bus. She comes over on Mondays, she has been for a couple years. But when she ends up not coming for some reason I end up being bummed. And when she does come I get in the worst mood because she stresses everyone out. My mom becomes such a beeyotch (no offense) to her because she is just so loud, annoying, nonstop, and eats everything in site. AND in the living room when every time she is over we tell her not to eat in ther (even tohugh we do, but it's our house). And my sister changes when she's over as well. She feels the need to be extra bratty and rude to our mom and try to act cool in front of her or something. Oh what seventh grade can do to you.
So when they walked inside, I was sitting on the couch watching SNL videos (The Lawrence Welk Show, LAWLZ.) And for a while she just sat like across the room, but suddenly she had an urge to sit next to me. Not next to me, but touching me. Really obnoxious. When I'm at the computer at home I hate when my sister sits on the couch a foot away from me, let alone RIGHT NEXT TO ME READING EVERY SINGLE THING IM DOING. So when she tried to grab one of the earbuds I was using to listen to the videos and block out all the sudden noise brought in my house, I declined. She was rather shocked because she's used to getting everything she wants. She really is a spoiled brat. She's on her what, sixth phone? I've have three phones in my life, and I only got the second one because with my first phone screen was completely black. I even used it for months while half of the screen was black. And of course all of her phones have been 200 dollars or more. Mine have been Free After Rebate phones. This is not jealousy. She is purely spoiled. When she loses a phone charger for her highly expensive phone, instead of getting a $10 charger, she gets a new phone. And the fact that when her mom can get an upgrade, Sammi gives her her "old" phone, and gets a new one, so she gets new phones twice as often. And when you include when she gets more phones when she loses them or breaks them or loses the charger, that is too many phones I can count on one hand. Extremely redonkulous. Back to the story. So of course the reason why she is sitting skin to skin, well shirt to shirt on the couch, is because my sister is sitting on the way other side with Doritos (Hahaha Tyler! Ah I miss those videos..) but for some reason she is compelled to breathe the same air I breathe. So eventually I dig in to let her watch videos when she says "Here, look up funny commercials... oh... is that what you wee watching..!?" So we watched a couple. Then I said I was tired of watching videos. And my friend was IMing me and upset about something, but I couldn't really talk to her because Sammi would have read every word before I got to. She was visiously texting to her oh-so-popular friends because she is just so cool and everyone loves her. Any ways. She was still reading it. I could tell. And that bugs me so much. For some reason I'm weird about when my sister sits close to me on the computer because she probably will read stuff and I hate that. So when my cousin hops on the couch RIGHT next to me, incase you didn't get that earlier, causing a lot of weight to weigh the recliner on the couch down, another pet peeve, when she asks "Why is the recliner, like, low and like, going down" And me and my mom respond something along the lines of "because the recliner in this couch is meant for one person. It is one seat... Not a lot of weight" She just pretended like that hint wasn't enough to kick her off.
She is rather dumb as well. And I really only say that because it is oh so VERY true. She stole the computer and went on wittyprofiles.com, and she found herself reading a "How to keep an idiot busy for hours, scroll down" And when you scroll down you read, "How to keep and idoit busy for hours, scroll up" As I look in the corner of my eyes she just keeps scrolling up and down up and down up and down asking why she doesn't get it. I respond with "Are you serious?! Like you're really kidding right? Please tell me you are. You REALLY don't get that,...REALLY?!" I made her feel like an idiot. But she is. She just kept pretending like she didn't understand, I mean really, do you have to ACT dumb to get attention, because I'm pretty sure every second of your life you try to have all eyes on you. Agh. And I only spent like 2 hours with her, because I luckily escaped to Lizz's house for a couple hours. Oh. And when Sammi was sitting next to me, she was eating her Doritos SO obnoxiously loud. Jessica, you'll understand this. She was nomnom-ing and crunchcrunch-ing. Like "[Ohmuhgawd! That's so disgusting!] NOMNOMNOM." Except it was in my ear. I HATE that. Wow I can't beleive how much she annoys me. In ONE day. She ruins my Friday. I was so tired and bitter already and she had to come and inconvenience everyone by making everyone else in a bad mood, when we're already in one. I mean she *can* be fun, when I *feel* like having fun with her. But most of the time when she is over I am far too tired, stressed out, and grumpy from school. She is just always peppy and hyper and loud. And my family is quiet, TV watching, hush toned voices. One good thing about her coming over, is that my mom says "when she comes over, she makes me appreciate my kids more", uh, thanks? Well, if you read all of this you are. An amazing person... and maybe I'll give you a prize.

So I can take Your fame and glory for all to see no matter where Your hand may lead me

rukgjgsnjksdmgbnsdfkjajdfmwolaksfnms dxcvjkdfnsdr.
So bascially I don't think my cousin is doing so good after all. My mom said my grandparents are acting like... it's the end... and I really don't want to think that. There still is hope. It doesn't have to be the end. I'm just scared. But I don't really know if it is as bad as they say it is, because my uncle's facebook status siad he would only be in the hospital for a day or two, yet my grandparents are liek really freaking out. I mean it's a bad situation. But my grandma always makes everything a huger deal than it really is, so sadly, I really don't know how bad things are when it comes ot Grandma. And it doesn't help that they are the only people who we get our information about all of that from. Erg. I don't know
Currently listening to: 100 Years
We really only do have one hundredyears ot live. Even less. Maybe even more, if pollution and cigarrette smoke lessens. Just because we're young and should make the best of our lives, that doesn't mean we have to go koo-koo-bananas(as said by Manny from Degrassi :P) and party and do everything to screw up our lives. It means find yourself, what you're good at, people who love and support you, and ENJOY life, not RUIN your life before you're out of high school ie. getting pregnant, getting drunk every weekend, getting high. I don't know if it's just me, but I kind of realize those ruin your future. So doing that, because EVERYONE is aware of what they can lead to and do to your body, you're asking to screw up your life and get the reputation you have. So when you think about only having a hundred years to live herre on earth and being young, making the best of it doesn't need ot be doing things that ruin your life. Find hapiness and love :]

I feel like moving to the rythm of Your grace Your fragrance is intoxicating In a secret place, 'Cause Your love is extravagant

Currently listening to: Your Love is Extravagant, Casting Crowns
Current mood: euodhjsndgkjmnsdbnBleh.

My uncle's facebook status is that my cousin is doing ok, and that he will bei n the hospital for a day or so until his white cell count is higher.
So I'm really glad he's doing better. The whole thing last night was just scary. When I found out, I was just like shaking with fear and coldness. But I also felt warm, because I have great friends to support me. And I could turn to so many people to ask you have Zaachi in their thoughts and prayers. But I also got more upset because that family lives in Pennsylvania. Sometimes make it up here for holidays. And I stress sometimes very strongly. They always had something better to do or felt sick so didn't feel like coming. Which I understand, but when you have about 18 family members here who you haven't seen in like a year, you'd think they'd try more. Then when they got Zaachi and found out how sick he was, they have a real excuse not to come up. Which sucks. Because I want to meet him. So badly. I can't even explain it. And his sister and one of his borthers is also living with my aunt. I absolutely love Jayden. She'd be like my best friend, if we kept in contact. But when we do see each other we have an amazing time. And I met Xavior once. He's really awesome and seems wicked nice. I'm so glad they found a great home with my aunt and uncle. They also have a little girl of their own, Maggie. I wish I could really watch her grow up. Everytime I see her she looks like a new person because she growsso much between the large gaps of family get togethers. If I could drive I would visit them very often, no matter how much it seems like they don't care about us up here. I mean, my uncle really doesn't. He would make a better effort to see us. This isn't jsut recently, the only reason I would probably know who he is, is because he was the gym teacher at the school I went to from like preschool to second grade. Out side of school I never saw him. Maybe once in a while I went to my grandparents house 5 minutes away to visit. Then he met Susie, who is his wife now. And whenever they would visit family would be HER family in West Virginia. They went there like every weekend thier first year of their marrage. And I remember even one time for Easter we had to keep rescheduling the day we did it (If it's not because of them, it's someone else in my family EVERY holiday) because they couldn't come. Then that day us kids were waiting patiently for hours for them to show up for us to go egg hunting because they just HAD to be there, even though they had no kids. So when they got there... they brought their luggage inside and said hi to everyone and left for a little bit to go shopping for Jayden, who wasn't in their custody or anything yet, it was years before. So. We waited hours for a hello the be able to be waved off to go searching for treasures such as candy and pennys. They came back later to hang out and such, but still. Humph. I just really had to vent. But I am extremely excited Zaachi is doing better. I hope I get to visit them sometime soon. Thanks for all your prayers and support<3

All our hope is in You, All the glory to You, God

The second I finished my last post, my mom told me that I neede to call my grandma because she wanted me to ask people to pray for my foster) cousin. I think I've said some stuff about him once. He is seven, maybe eight years old. I haven't been able to meet him yet for like a year. Any ways. They found out he had cancer in his legs, crushing his bones, in his hips, and in his lungs. He was doing pretty well and had a couple operations. But, at this very moment he is in the hospital with a high fever, excruciating pain in his hip, and a white blood cell count of zero. I have typed those words to I don't know how many people, within like. Thirty minutes. Asking like everyone I know to please please please pray for him. So please, if you are reading this, please do. I'm so scared and I don't know right now. Thanks... I'll keep everyone updated...

We were meant to live for so much more, we lost ourselves

I just got this in an email, and I usually read it and don't pass anything on or care about it, but I really liked what this man said.
"No matter how good things are in your life, there is always something bad that needs to be worked on. And no matter how bad things are in your life, there is always something good you can thank God for.
You can focus on your purposes, or you can focus on your problems: If you focus on your problems, you're going into self-centeredness, which is "my problem, my issues, my pain." But one of the easiest ways to get rid of pain is to get your focus off yourself and onto God and others."

This caught my eye because so many people think that when something bad happens, that it attracts more bad things, and they suddenly think everything surrounded by them is bad. But that's not true... because no matter what, there will always be something great in your life. And sometimes just knowing that there is something to look forward to and live for, is all that keeps them living. So, know that there is always going to be something wrong, but there will always be something right, at the same time. Having something to deal with all the time is good... because if everything is perfect... what's the point in anything. I just wish anyone struggling with their life would know that. Because I know if I didn't know what I knew today, I would want to know that :] It's not like anyone reading this is dealing with that problem... at least I don't think... Well... if you are... just know that... :D

You're the rock on which I stand

So all today I was thinking anout things to blog. And I was excited. Because there's a lot that is frustrating me and connected and such. But. Of course I forget. Funny how I forget what I'm mad about. Whatever. So new semester today. I have like no friends. In Geometry, gym, and culinary arts. And English is fun. In history there's someone I want to because friends with because one of my best friends is best friends with. But we didn't talk. Haha hopefully there will be more growth in our friendship :P And well, in English, we got to chose groups to work in... so I wanted to work with the friendish people in the class. But there wasn't enough room because the groups could only be so big. It was just really frustrating. I was with one of my friends,lets call her Jane. But all she did was complain about how she wasn't welcome at the other table and how they didn't care about her or I, and I just felt like she was only with me because she was mad at her friends, and not actually to be there for me so I wasn't having to work alone, slash with a group of people I didn't want to work with. And the other friends of ours didn't even care that we were separated. It sucks when you feel unwanted... and the fact that they didn't like realize that we were left to work with only each other rather than like a group of 4 which we were suppose to do, is just arg. But whatever. And since in lunch my 2 friends at our old table got switched, I had to find somewhere else to sit. But all my friends in that period wanted to sit in the same place. And there's not enough room for all of us. So I have to figure out something because I don't want to be a bother and take someone else's seat that sat there before. I don't know. Whatever.
I've done pretty well on my midterms that I've gotten back. I think I got an 89 in Biology, and somewhere around a B in Spanish. I thought I was going to like fail Spanish so I guess that's good. Oh. And my cousin, she's 18. Apparently she's moving to Florida in less than a week. Okayyy. I don't think she'll stay their long because I don't think she's ready to live on her own. I don't know why she's going there but I know she met a guy online from Florida and visited him a little while ago. I hope she's not like rushing or something. Andd I also found out like stuff she does and it makes me sad how she's totally not what I thought she was. And her parents think shes and angel. Ha yeah right. And her younger brother is 14. He smokes I think. And he's always saying inappropriate tings. Like he always told my sister all this bad stuff when she was really young. He's so disgusting.Erg that's all for now. I'm off the listen to Chris Tomlin. Or watch Norman Gentle on youtube more. ha ha.

Free, now I am free, Your love rescued me, Now it's the anthem I'm singing

Currently listening to: You Lifted me Out, Chris Tomlin
Changed to: God of this City, Chris Tomlin.

So um yeah I'm jamming to Chris Tomlin's Hello Love. Not like anyone besides Aliison cares :P

Erg. I've been so like I don't know. Like emotional. Not EMO. Emotional. Many emotions. I think it has to do with my brother. He lives 10 minutes away, yet os much has changed. But it's so much better than people who have to stay millions of miles away form eachother. Or say goodbye forever. Erg. And my mom has been weird lately too. Because it;s around the time 6 years ago she slipped on ice and messed up her back which has led to oh so much more. And the anniversary of my Aunt Amanda's death, of brain cancer, is today too. I really wish I could have met her. I did, but I was two when she died. Why couldn't we have memories that young? My Uncle Duane... who died when he was 18, I never met him. Everyone says he said he remembered BEING born. Is that possible? Hmm. I wish I knew him too. All the great people that could be in my life died before I turned 8. I still have family at least. I just am sick of their drama and self absorbed-ness. (Currently listening to: I Will Rise) Erg. And one of my best friends might have to go to a catholic school in New York next year. Which is cool, but I'm just selfish and don't want her to go. I'll see her on weekends, but it's just the fact that she's not there. Or that I'm not there for her physically. I'm just scared we'll grow apart. I'm sick of growing apart from great people in my life. I wish my life would kind of stay the same it is right now. Yet at the same time I wish it wouldn't. I don't know. It's not like she's my only friend. And maybe even being separated can make us closer. As long as it's for the best. Merg. I guess that's all for now. I've already blogged twice today and all.

Comatose, don't wanna wake up with out and overdose of youuu

Just sitting here eating an apple. Just did two extremely long survey note things on facebook. I'm done with those for a while. Or a day. As I was typing this I choked on the apple I'm eating for 2 brief minutes. My cousin Sammi is over. Currently eating Cool Ranch Doritos quite obnoxiously. One of my pet peeves. My sister is yelling and threatening the dog for no reason, so Buddy is trying to attack her. She jumped in the recliner and put the recliner up... as Buddy was jumping... and I think it hit him and he pounced back... my mom almost cried. Actually she like WAS crying.
I, well my mom, ordered CDs the other day, they just came. They consist of (Allison cares) Chris Tomlin's Hello Love. And Not of us (I think it's called that?) Um Across the Universe soundtrack. Mamma Mia sountrack. Some Switchfoot CDs, old ones. And my mom got some Beatles. Oh! And Skillet. And olderish one... because I have the most recent.. I think.
Okay well I hope you enjoy my uber boring story but not even really a story.
Oh. DBQ today went okay I guess. It took me the whole time, I hope I did good because I got a 72 on the multiple choice which counts as half. And English went well. It was pretty easy. So Yup. I'm extremely excited midterms are over. Not excited about having Kwassymodum though :P But I will probs make friends in there (none of mine are in there..) to make funny of him, what was it Allison? His jiggley neck? Haha now I'm just picturing you shake your head in a I-Have-Multiple-Chubby-Chins-Just-Like-My-Biffle-Kwassy. And I found a friend that I have Culinary with so it should be fun. I still have the same lunch. But I don't know what I'm going to do about like where to sit and such :|

You are so beautiful, to mee...

I'm watching the Little Rascals, amazing movie :] And I haven't seen it in a while so I'm excited. I loved when Alfalfa was singing to Darla on the boat<3 Well. My internet is going crazy and keeps going in and out on my neighborhood and such. The TV even went out for a couple minutes. IN THE MIDDLE OF THE LITTLE RASCALS TOO ! But right now the internet is working, so I'm happy. Erg. I really want to get a new phone, the Matrix... it has a keyboard and such and I really want a phone like that. But it's a lot, and not a necessity either so I guess that won't happen unless I use over 200 dollars of my own. And I really want a new computer, which is even more. But I'm fed up with everyone getting pissed at me for everything wrong with the computer. My mom has been like blaming me for a lot ever since my brother moved out. But I can't blame my parents because they have a lot going on and having him move out is a big deal and everything. Maybe for my birthday I can pay for like half of a laptop or something. I don't think Keswick will be open this summer, so technically, money used for a computer or something would have normally been used for Keswick. Ugh I don't know. I don't NEED any of this, and we don't have the money and I definitely don't have the money. So I'm just being stupid :] And I'm sure no one wants to hear me complaining about getting new expensive things and then complaining about no money. Lalala. I went to church today, and I always go with one of my friends, and another friends usually goes every other week (because when she's with her dad every other weekend she doesn't go). But the past like 2 months with snow and other things, she has come like twice when I'm there. And she came today so it was fun :] Ugh I have my DBQ and english midterms tomorrow. Four hours of writing. Pure joy. And then new semester and schedules. Can't wait to have Kwassykins. Not. :]